you more than anyone...

Being single and heading toward a milestone birthday can make anyone’s knees a bit jiggly. Well... at least if you are a birthday whore like me. I love them... I believe they should be reveled in...played with until they are too tired to stand up and that everyone you meet should know it’s your day. The length of time that this indulgence should be given is up to the user. I personally like to take the month...with the ‘week of’, being the pinnacle.

With no special someone to rely on for this month long festival, I made plans.

It started as a four-day-grand-adventure-spiritual-fasting-vision-quest, and tumbled into a 1.5 day camp in the woods by yourself, eat cucumbers and blueberries then hurl yourself down a rushing river.

Not a bad compromise.

In doing this, I discovered two .. no three.. ok, four things.

one: I LOVvvvvEE camping.
two: I’m head over heels for the city of Bend, OR
three: the mosquitoes in Bend are organized and hungry
four: camping by yourself maybe not as spectacular as envisioned.

I arrived in town around 4pm and set about the task of finding out where I could camp. A friendly soul at the tea shop told me about a few locations just outside of town. I purchased my first kombucha and headed out. Driving all of maybe 5 min I came to a dirt road, deemed it worthy and turned. As I was only 5 min from town, it wasn’t too remote, but I certainly was alone...or was I? Oh good grief, my imagination was kicking in. "I know I am safe, I know I am safe, I know i am.." but that didn’t stop me from spending the next 9 hrs shuttling between a languid state of bliss and a p**p your pantz “omg I’m gonna die!” fear.

After ‘marking’ my territory, or giving a path for the killers to find me, I couldn’t decide, I tucked myself into bed, equipped with a flashlight and a sense of hearing so acute, I could hear caterpillars munching in Detroit. Every crick and crackle received my rapt attention. “Ok, you can do this...breathe...appreciate where you are....” Nope, still scared. Sigh.

As I gazed thru my mesh force field, I prayed that my bones would not be the only thing left of me by morning.

But wait.. this was not why I came. There were stars weren’t there? There had to be stars. I started to count...one...two...three..infinity...infinity +1. As I counted and became more involved with the grace of the night, the fear slowly dropped away.

Day one - blissfully successful.

For day two of birthday extravaganza...I had planned to go on my first white water rafting trip. It felt like Christmas, I was so excited.

Let me just say, white water rafting is pure awesomey goodness. .LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.

The following day was Aug 4th.. the day of. My sweet friend had offered to take me to the coast, YEY ocean! We planned to meet at noon, then noon-thirty, then 1.. ok how about 2.. 2:30? Perfect.

Finally packed and leaving the house at 2:15, my mum arrived with a large bouquet of flowers and got swept up into driving me over to Zoe’s. Thanks mum : )

I arrived at z’s and headed out to the back deck to find the most stunning gift display I’ve ever seen! Prosecco, flowers saturated in oranges and yellows, a tiny red suitcase with travel tags... and COOKIES!!

After some toasting and photos...I opened my wee suitcase {which in itself was enough to make me swoon} But it was what I found inside that rendered me slightly useless. I didn’t know what to say.

You see, I have never been out of the country and for my 40th I wanted to go! Miss z knew this. And what she did was amazing. She and about 14 other friends {organized by miss z} had pooled together $$ to send me somewhere. The gift came with travel stickers, a travel journal, suggestions of where to go, sweet cards and offers of time shares. shock. I was in shock.

I couldn’t believe that so many had come together...and the thought and planning and the care. This thing they had done, it touched my heart.

Through the generosity of life and the best friends a girl could ask for, I was reminded that I don't have one special someone I have MANY special someones.

A giant sized thank you to all the wonderful people in my life, I am blessed beyond measure..

THANK YOU!!!!!

..........I've quoted it before, but it stands repeating, “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” –buddha...........

Please be kind and gentle to yourselves dear friends. love yourself well so that you may love the world.

-xox-

{p.s. to be continued....}